How To Deal With Grief And Loss Part 1 by Pastor Dolapo Lawal: MP3 Download & Sermon Notes

Understanding Death: What the Bible Actually Says

Grief is one of the most sensitive territories a person can walk through, and the goal in approaching it from scripture is not to give polished answers — it is to make sure the word of God actually reaches the heart. The question is not whether death is painful. The question is what to understand about it.

Death Is Inevitable — and That Is Not the Final Word

The first thing to understand is that death is inevitable. It is a debt that everyone born into this fallen world must pay.

• Ecclesiastes 3:2 — "There is a time to be born and a time to die."
• Ecclesiastes 9:5 — "The living know that they will die."
• Hebrews 9:27 — "It is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment."

Death is inevitable. Even in the incarnation — when God became a human being — the Bible says he tasted death. He did not exempt himself from what it means to live in a fallen world. He did not have to die as a sinner, because he had no sin. But in 2 Corinthians 5:21, he was made sin — he who knew no sin — so that humanity might be made the righteousness of God in him. He tasted death to deliver people from the fear of it.

The only exception is the generation that experiences the rapture — where, as 1 Corinthians 15 describes, in the twinkling of an eye at the sound of the trumpet, the dead in Christ rise first, and those alive are caught up to meet them in the sky. But apart from that generation, everyone will die.

Resurrection Miracles Were Signs — Not the Final Solution

There are eleven miracles of resurrection recorded in the Bible. Every single one of them was a restoration to mortal life — not the final defeat of death.

• The widow's son raised by Elijah — 1 Kings 17:22
• The Shunammite's son raised by Elisha — 2 Kings 4:35
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Pastor Dolapo Lawal
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• The widow of Nain's son raised by Jesus — Luke 7:14-15
• Lazarus raised by Jesus — John 11:43-44
• Tabitha raised by Peter — Acts 9:40
• Eutychus raised by Paul — Acts 20:9

All eleven people raised from the dead in scripture are dead today. Lazarus came back to natural life — ate at a dinner table with Jesus in John 12, walked around, lived — but he eventually died again. Why? Because he was not raised with an immortal body. What he received was restoration to mortal life.

If any of those eleven were still alive today, they would be claiming to be the Christ — because Jesus is the only one raised from the dead who now possesses the glorified, immortal body. He is the firstfruits. They were foretastes of what is coming — signs pointing forward — but not the final thing.

God's ultimate plan is not to delay death. It is to abolish it completely through resurrection at the return of Christ.

Death Is an Enemy — and You and God Are on the Same Side

1 Corinthians 15:26 — "The last enemy that will be destroyed is death."

The Bible calls death an enemy. This is important because many people, in their grief, direct their pain at God — as though he is on death's side, as though he sent it, as though he approved it. But you and God are on the same team against the same enemy. This is called comradeship. God sees death as an enemy the same way the grieving person does.

When Jesus arrived at the tomb of Lazarus in John 11, he already knew he was going to raise him from the dead. He knew the outcome. And yet the Bible says he wept.

Why did Jesus weep if he was about to reverse the situation?

Two reasons:

1. He was showing us the kind of God he is

   He is not a God who just fixes things. He is a God who sympathizes. In his hands are both sympathy and comfort — not just results. Look at God's conversation with Elijah in 1 Kings 19. Elijah had just finished a great showdown, and then collapsed into depression. The spirit of Jezebel was attacking him. He was done. God's response was not a lecture — it was: angels, give him food. God listened to Elijah rant. He comforted him before correcting him. He was in tune with the humanity of the moment.

   There are times people speak to God in raw anger — almost cursing at him — because of hurt. And yet he comforts. His response is something like: I know you are rude right now. I get it. You are in pain in this moment. And so he listens, and comforts, and gives his word.

2. He was weeping over what was not supposed to be

   Death was not God's original plan. He designed man to live forever. When Jesus stood at the tomb and saw everyone weeping, there was something like: this was not my script. This was not the design. Lazarus, you — this — was outside what I intended for humanity.

   God seeing his children suffering because of what was not his original design moved him in compassion to cry.

   Don't say it was God that did it. You and God see death as a common enemy.

There is a distinction worth making: Does God kill? Yes. Does God murder? No. Murder is criminal, unjust, and unfair. But justice and killing are not the same thing. A soldier returning fire in battle is not murdering. A judge sentencing a repeat offender is not murdering. God kills injustice. That is different from the enemy of death, which came through the fall and was not his design for humanity.