Opening Destiny Doors Through Relationships by Apostle Joshua Selman: MP3 Download & Sermon Notes

The house of God is where God dwells

Psalm 84:7

Strength to strength is the heritage of anyone who takes God and His house seriously

Spiritual growth is not a gift. You press with intention, with determination. You take advantage of the grace given by God and you press Philippians 3:13-14

The house of God is not a museum. It is not a cinema center. It is more than a recreation center. When you come, you will be enlightened and inspired

I believe in joy, gladness and fun. But the house of God is where God dwells

Illustration: looking for a man

When you want to look for a man you go to his house. There is no guarantee you will always find him in his office or in some other place.

But if you are patient enough, no matter where he has gone, he will eventually return home

When you travel out of the nation your phone shows different dates and timings. When you return home it lets you know you are back. It knows when you come home

The house of God is not just where believers converge. It is where God has covenanted that He will be with them forever Psalm 132:8, Psalm 132:14

The presence of God makes all the difference. Minus the presence of God we are just making noise, at best motivating and inspiring people. The presence factor is what is responsible for life

Psalm 133

When we are gathered together, in the presence of God you expect to be healed, lifted and changed. It is more than mental transformation. Something is happening to your spirit man

The word falls on every ground

Jesus gave a parable about the word. The sower went to sow. The seed is the word of God. It fell on four kinds of ground

In studying it I became amazed that the sower gave even a rocky ground a chance. Any farmer knows some soils are a waste of seed

When he saw all rock and thorns, nothing would come out. But so that he would not be charged by us, he gave every soil a chance. That's God for you

Some ground produced, others did not. Among those that produced there were three levels of harvest: 30-fold, 60-fold and 100-fold

What makes ground good is that they hear and understand. They heard the word and then they understood

God has declared this our year of open doors. The word must speak clearly in your life

3 platforms for opening closed doors

1. The right or correct key. A wrong key and the door will not open. Keys refer to knowledge
2. The art of knocking Matthew 7:7-8. There are doors you will not have the keys to. You will need to knock for them to open
3. The use of force, the supernatural and the power of God

I have watched this lift people from literally nothing to positions of grace and power. I have also watched the neglect of what you are about to learn take people from grace to grass

The purpose of the teaching of the word of God is to give us wisdom. At the end of any spiritual discussion, if you do not have wisdom, then it was not the word

John 1:9

There are false lights. They carry a semblance of victory and liberty, but upon engaging them in real life they produce no results

May you not waste your time chasing shadows. May you not waste your time acquiring a lot of useless spiritual information

The only way you know what is real is when you test it in real life situations

Those who know how to knock keep flipping doors open from one dimension to another. Those who do not understand this can stand stagnated before cheap doors, sometimes for many years

Opening destiny doors through relationships

Luke 11:5-10

Opening doors is among friends, not strangers

When the man was in trouble he did not run around. He went straight to his friend. Only a friend can accommodate that level of inconvenience. You don't go to a stranger at midnight, he will arrest you

Friendship provides an advantage. Even in uncomfortable circumstances, rules can be bent

The man said "friend." He didn't call him by name. He invoked the relationship. Under normal circumstances you should be offended, but he is reminding him that the platform of his demand is friendship

The purpose of meeting his friend was to help honor another friend. Ordinarily the friend should be sleeping, but someone inconvenienced him and he bent over because of relationship

The friend who inconvenienced him came from a journey unprepared. He did not drive him away.

Now he is stranded as a person, so he must do the same thing

When you read the Bible you have to read by the spirit, otherwise it will be before you and you will not see it

The man inside never called him friend. He did not reciprocate. He refused to open

Jesus says in verse 8 there are two possibilities. He can arise because he is his friend. Or he can arise because of importunity, persistence almost to the point of annoyance

So a door can be opened through friendship and because of friendship

Proverbs 13:20

It never said he that is around wise men. It said he that walks with them. You move as they move

When the man started the journey he was not wise. His friends were wise. His secret was that he chose to walk with them, and the Bible guarantees that he shall be wise.

You can predict the future of that person

We don't know whether the companion of fools was wise before. We just know the people around him were fools

Matthew 4:19

I will not make you when you stand afar. I will not make you when you sit afar wishing. Follow me is the price of your making

Relationships and destiny

Destiny fulfillment and advancement is practically impossible without relationships and strategic connections

It is impossible to actualize destiny and make constructive progress ignoring this deep spiritual mystery. It is a master key to opening doors

Relationships are bridges to an exceptional life. Relationships are also bridges to a life of pain and regret

Standing before you are an exceptional life in Christ, a life of Kingdom impact, and a life of pain, regret and destruction. The bridge to either is relationships

Relationships are currencies

Like dollars, pounds and naira, relationships can buy what money can buy and where money stops, they can buy what money cannot buy

Money cannot buy your salvation. But a relationship with the Lord Jesus can make salvation a reality in your life

I am not downplaying financial resources. But money does not solve every problem

May you never be so poor that all you have is money

Men have risen to enviable destinies from modest and sometimes shameful backgrounds using the leverage of relationships.

The Bible and history are full of ordinary men and women with no comeliness who found this mystery and rose through the ladder and lift of relationships. Spiritually, economically, sociologically, politically

They are also full of men and women who neglected it. Some threw away relationships to look for money, men like Judas Iscariot, and they lost both

Judas threw away a valuable relationship to pursue a lesser thing. He got the money, but having lost the relationship, the money did not benefit him. He lost everything, including his life

The easiest way to succeed in life and destiny is through relationships. There are many factors in the success equation and all have their place, but few come close to this key

Many people see only money in their dreams while awake. They don't care who lives or dies. We think our life will magically be relevant when we have money. May not necessarily be so

Destinies are enhanced and glorified through relationships

3 dimensions of relationship that open doors

If you do not have these 3 in your life, there is no future for you as far as open doors are concerned

1. Your relationship with God

   Matthew 22:37-40

   Every word that came by the prophets and every dictate for the nation of Israel was to get them to achieve two things: love for God and love for men

   Proverbs 23:26

   This scripture has become an anthem in my life. God is asking not just for your tithe, not just for your offering, not just for your membership. He is looking for your heart

   2 Chronicles 15:12-15

   They bound themselves corporately with an oath that they would seek the Lord, and anybody who violated it would be put to death, whether small or great, man or woman

   The Lord gave them rest round about. Not because they were intellectually sound, educationally or sociologically advantaged, or had wealthy parents.

   When God saw the seriousness of their heart to seek Him with their everything, He gave them rest

   Matthew 19:26

   There are things only possible with God. A healthy relationship with God defines the extent of the possibilities you experience

   Do not believe that because you are saved every possibility will manifest automatically. As far as the finished work of Christ is concerned, every possibility should manifest.

   But entering into the experience depends on a functional, ever growing relationship with God

   Nothing and no one should take God's place

   There is nothing and no one that should sustain the ability to take the place of God in your life and interrupt your work with God

   God will fight anything and anyone who stands in His way, even if he is the one who gave you that blessing.

   God can fight what He gave you the moment it becomes an interruption to His place and purposes in your life. It becomes His enemy

   Like Satan. God created Satan and still grants us the grace to perpetually defeat him. God has not forgotten Satan is His creation.

   But Satan assumed a position where he can no longer bring joy to God, so he does not secure God's support

   God does not just initiate processes. He vets them periodically to find out that He is being glorified through them. If He stops being glorified, His backing ceases, except by His mercy

   Many people are destroyed by what God gave them. God made Saul king and that position brought him shame and reproach. Pride came as a result of the position of the anointed cherub that covers Ezekiel 28:14

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   Just because God gave you something does not mean it will automatically glorify Him. You have to be intentional about using everything around your life to see that Jesus is glorified

   Take God seriously

   Many believers ignore a healthy relationship with God. They say, "I'm not into all this gym Christianity, but God knows I'm serious." You can never fake seriousness. It is palpable

   Many believers do not intend to take God seriously.

   They do not plan to throw Him out of their lives, they just keep Him at the minimum level, enough to secure life after death like an insurance, while they do everything they want

   If you want God to honor you, if you want to command power and relevance in our world, make up your mind that you are going to go all out for God

   Some of us did not start with a desire for ministry, fame or greatness. This journey started from a blind and sincere pursuit. Lord, I love you, it is a privilege to be called yours

   While we press and give God literally everything, He said, this is how far you can go for Me, now let Me show you how far I can go for you

   Do not covet the result of a genuine lover of God. It is a reflection of the depth of their love for God 1 Corinthians 2:9

   It is for them that love Him. Not those who use Him for fame, for publicity for ministry, or as a ladder into a great life

   There are men of God who do not love God. Church members, business people, people with Christian names who do not love God. There are biblical indices that show whether or not you love God

   When you say, God I love you, He will ask, let me see what you can give up for me.

   We are used to fake love in this wicked world and think we can play that politics with God

   John 21:15

   Do you love me more than ministry? More than titles?

   There are people who will throw God away to protect ministry. Who will throw God away to protect their ego. Who will throw God away if their money is falling, and hold the money.

   Who will throw God away for their pedigree

   The men and women God will do mighty things through in today's world are dead to every other thing

   The price for all of God is all of you. You need more than your brain for God to do business with you. It takes more than good English to put a generation at the command of Heaven

   It is the foolishness of loving God that brought us this far. Never become too intelligent to remain that baby

   Pedigree, position and prestige have come to a point where they replace God and push Him out of many lives. The rich fool came down in one day and his life was demanded from him Luke 12:20

   Passion for God is not about fanaticism and not about being a preacher.

   Don't leave passion for God to pastors and say, "God has called me into entrepreneurship, so I can't love Him that way." Who told you that?

   Go and find those who loved God as governmental figures like Daniel, as economists like Joseph. They were not preachers, yet you could not argue their love for God Daniel 6, Genesis 41

   Some of you, your love language is money. When we talk of money, business and rising, now you are speaking my language. Repent

   I will give up Koinonia and close it down a thousand times to maintain my relationship with God

   This is eternal life

   John 17:3

   Eternal life is not about reciting a prayer alone

   Until God means everything to you, until your love and passion for Jesus and the things of the Spirit consume you and are above every other desire, you are not ready for the relationship that opens doors

   There are men who will stand in an empty space, and because of their love for God, you will carry a door wherever it is and open it in front of them.

   That is how far He can go

   Jeremiah 31:3

   It is time to return to your first love

   Your first love is not your husband, your wife or your children. It was because of Him that they all arrived. Don't let their presence drive Him out

   This is how we started, a blind, sincere pursuit. Lord, if you never bless me you still have my all. If you never lift me you still have my all.

   Not, Lord I'm giving you two weeks, if you don't move don't blame me

   • Lord, I don't know what has taken Your place in my life. The pursuit of fame, of money, of positions. Break it right now.
   • I return, O Lover of my soul, O Lover of my destiny. Church stole my heart from You. Marriage stole my heart from You. A job stole my heart from You. Fans stole my heart from You. Naira, dollars and pounds stole my heart from You. But I return.
   • Take all of me. You have my everything. Anoint my everything.
   • Father, I love You more than ministry. More than prophecy. More than marriage. More than children. More than a job. More than business excellence. More than financial prosperity.
   • Let my love for fame and power go behind the cross. Let my desire for material things move behind in the queue. Nothing and no one should take Your place.
   • If I perish, let me perish loving You. If I go forward, let me go forward loving You. If I mark time, let me mark time loving You. If I rise, let me rise loving You.
   • Everything I will ever get that will demand my not loving You, may it never come to me.

   Friend of God

   Jesus called His disciples friends once the intimacy grew John 15:15

   God can give you a title called friend of God. Abraham had that name James 2:23. It is more noble than prayer warrior or fasting giant

   In friendship there are no secrets. There is the opening of secrets. God could hide this from His creation but not from His friend Abraham Genesis 18:17

   Abraham came not just as God's creation but as a friend. He said, since you have called me friend, allow me to negotiate. I have an interest in Sodom and Gomorrah Genesis 18:23-33

   Lot was someone who had been Abraham's friend, but the quest for material things drove him away. Yet as long as there is one person still carrying that point of connection, he can advocate.

   Remember, the man inside did not call him friend but the one outside still did

   Do not be surprised when you see the benefits of friendship following certain people Proverbs 18:24

   There is a deeper level of friendship. There is a deeper dimension than nominal Christianity. There is a river, come deeper. You will be more effective when you become My friend.

   Ezekiel 47

   Some of you may need to go for a retreat after this. The destiny you are seeing and the level of relationship you are giving God, you can't arrive there

   That is not how a prophetic mantle will land on you. That is not how an apostolic call will come. It is not by buying suits and sharing cards

   There are rivers. You have to dive deep Job 28:7. There are very deep dimensions of intimacy with God.

   That is where power resides. That is where rest resides

   There is a realm in the spirit where you have surrendered everything because you love Him.

   When your hands are empty, not holding anything, then He can hold your hands and you will find out that you have everything

   Our mundane pursuit of things is eroding our passion for God, especially this generation

   Anything that claims to give you what only God can give, you are dealing with fraudulence

   No amount of publicity will bring increase to your ministry above and beyond your relationship with God. No amount of intellectual soundness will replace the impact of the word that comes at the instance of relationship

2. Your relationship with men

   Psalm 8:1-6

   Without any man Your name is already excellent. Yet as excellent as You are, there is something only men can give You.

   As excellent and powerful as You are, there is something the ministry of man does to You

   What is man?

   You are already God by Yourself, needing no support and no encouragement, not threatened by any other kingdom or force

   The whole Bible is about your relationship with man. Why does God run around man as though He were vulnerable?

   Is it not an inconvenience for You, O God, to leave heaven and come to the earth? You could create another reality and ignore this man.

   But what is it about this man, in spite of his sin, deterioration and stubbornness?

   God's people experience abundance and deviate from the path of God. They are given to the hands of their enemies and become slaves for many years.

   God Himself sends a prophet to say, I'm still interested in you, come back to Me

   The psalmist contemplated whether there is something in men that we don't know. You make it look like without man You cannot be God

   What is in man that man himself does not know? If you ignore this mystery you may as well remain where you are, because there will be no motion in your life. That is a guarantee

   Psalm 8:5-6

   The word angels there is Elohim

   Man builds skyscrapers many times his height and is not threatened by them. He starts from one block and one construction material and he actually does it. The wildest animals on earth have been tamed by man

   I watched a video of a hungry, angry elephant by the road. It struck a car as though throwing a piece of paper. It stepped on a watermelon like paper and crushed it.

   Yet man can tame it

   God shows so much passion around man, but men do not know what a man is. That's why we keep losing

   God, the creator of the ends of the earth, did not ignore man. God is not ashamed to show His vulnerability towards men.

   God speaks of His love for man Jeremiah 31:3

   Ezekiel 22:30

   He didn't say I called for a man. He said I sought, meaning God kept moving from end to end looking for a man

   If God is looking for man, you better look for men, because there is something in man.

   If the God of the heavens has not ignored men, then respectfully, it is lack of wisdom for you to ignore men

   We pride over self-sufficiency. We are embarrassed to acknowledge we are incapacitated and that it takes the input of other people to make us whole.

   But here is God, the complete El Shaddai, who declares His vulnerability over man. Jesus came and died, sinless God, not for Himself but for man

   The earth belongs to men

   Psalm 115:16

   Who are the stewards of the earth? Men

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   Apostle Joshua Selman

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   Satan does not own the earth. He is only the god of the systems, not the earth. The power of Satan is derived from his partnership with man.

   Outside of man, Satan cannot wield dominion over the earth. It was not given to him

   He controls the systems and the systems now control man, so it looks like he is controlling man. He designed an antichrist system that works upon the minds of men. But dominion was given to men

   If you are not a man you cannot have dominion on earth. Satan cannot, because he is not a man

   Genesis 1:26

   The condition for being a man is, number one, you must be a spirit. Number two, that spirit must be hosted in a material body created from the elements consistent with this ecosystem

   Other spirits with spirit bodies from other dimensions cannot be called men because their bodies were not sourced from the earth. That is why Satan and every other spirit has to depend on man

   As long as there is one man on earth under the influence of this software, Satan is strengthened and can look like he has dominion over man. But God gave the earth to man

   The man at Bethesda: "I have no man"

   John 5:1-9

   This was not a parable. It actually happened

   The man had an infirmity for 38 years

   His reply was that he had no man. He never said I have no energy. His limitation was that he had potential to be healed but was not connected to any man who could provide the leverage

   He took responsibility. He knew he had no man to put him into the pool

   It is logical to assume the other who got in first had a man to help him. If men could not help men he would not say I have no man.

   Somebody who had a man got the leverage and acceleration to enter the pool first

   This is the story of many people. Why have you not risen till now? The correct answer for many is, I have no man.

   I have not placed value on strategic relationships enough to provide leverage for my home, my company, my ministry, my business

   Jesus did not call him a liar. He knew the man was right. Verse 8, Jesus says in effect, you got it right, you have no man, but now here is a Man.

   Since you were attentive enough to understand the value of men, I have come as a man

   Why has Abuja not opened up for you for decades in spite of being born and bred here? I have gifts and degrees, but I have no man

   All blessings come from God, but they come through men to men

   From God, through men, to men. You can complete that sentence with anything

   If God says yes and the man to partner with Him says no, the yes will remain in the realm of the spirit. It will not manifest here.

   When God says yes, the bride must also say yes for it to manifest. Not the Spirit alone, not the bride alone Revelation 22:17

   Many are stranded in life and destiny, and the honest explanation is, I have no man. No friend, no helper. Why is ministry stunted, why do easy things look difficult?

   I have no man who can mentor me and show me the dynamics of excelling with integrity

   Why are you so financially incapacitated because of 10,000? Why have you not paid your rent? "I don't have a job" is not the right answer. The answer is, I have no man

   There is always a man behind the results men produce by God

   Israel had God for 430 years and were still slaves. God was there, but the man who would work in partnership with God had not shown up

   There was a prophecy to Abraham that their time would be 400 years Genesis 15:13. Exactly 30 years were added because of the delay in training the man who would come Exodus 12:40

   Moses stood before Pharaoh Exodus 5:1

   God was saying now is the time for the Exodus, but a man had to stand before Pharaoh. It was not God who appeared before Pharaoh. He backed the man He sent

   Your life can be put in indefinite pain, regret, perpetual cycles of defeat and lack of fulfillment simply because you have no man

   Proverbs 14:28

   A king's honor is not in the vastness of the palace or the dexterity of the treasury

   King Ahasuerus was king over 127 provinces. The kingdom was about to split into two because one woman, Vashti, was going to misbehave Esther 1.

   There was no war, the treasuries were not looted, the military did not disobey. One woman was about to cause trouble in that kingdom

   Men are more powerful than you know. Most of us choose many other things and leave men

   Everything you call business or commerce finds its value because there is a man. Take all men out of the earth. Open the banks, open the CBN vaults, leave the ATM card. Will it profit you?

   Cain cried that his punishment was too great Genesis 4:13-15. Something was put on his life that would make no man come near him. The beasts were not going to eat him.

   He said every man who sees me will kill me, and God put a mark on him

   In all his punishment God still gave him the benefit of relationship. Cain built a city and named it after his son Genesis 4:17.

   There was a future for him in spite of rebellion and the curse of God

   All hope is never lost for a man who has a man by his side, in addition to the God of heaven

   Why do men ignore men when God does not? Arrogance and largely ignorance. These are the two major reasons men have not maximized relationships

   Every aspect of this ministry is credited to the mercy and grace of God, but through men to men. The job you have came from God, but through men to men

   Your superior at work is not an angel or a spirit. He is a human being with the power to fight you.

   You pray, God favor me, what is in this man that he cannot increase my pay? God will do something to him and the man will call you.

   You call it answered prayer because the answer was in the hand of a man

   In this Kingdom who hates you does not matter. But knowing this world is men dependent, who loves you matters

   When you say you need God alone with respect to the overall dynamics of the cosmos, you will spend your lifetime learning a bitter and painful lesson

   Illustration: Simon of Cyrene

   Jesus is on His way to Golgotha, bleeding from all the lacerations, weak. Jesus falls on the way. If there was no man for Jesus, He would have died there

   If Jesus died on the ground He could not be made a curse Galatians 3:13

   One man, Simon of Cyrene, came and lifted the cross for Him Luke 23:26. Jesus did not say, this is redemption, none of your business.

   He allowed the man to help while He regained the energy left for Him to die

   Jesus needed men. When He resurrected, after the coronation service in heaven, He did not go to another planet to rejoice.

   He came back straight to the earth and gathered 120 men and said, even though I am the glorified Christ, I still need you Acts 1:15

   The Holy Ghost came upon man Acts 2. The gospel advances from nation to nation not by the will of God alone but through men. If you ignore men in your life you will pay a serious price

   Principles of sustainable relationships

   Men are ladders and men can provide leverage to your life and destiny

   There are systems of advantage, the ministry of men. Like climbing a ladder from one dimension to another

   God will always use men for your rising. Satan will always use men for your falling and destruction

   Relationships are investments

   Not like investments. They are investments. When you list the investments you have, real estate, shares, do not leave relationships out

   If I were interviewing you and that was all you listed, I would advise you to quickly go and start making the most superior investment, man

   If you tell somebody men are an investment and he laughs, feel sorry for him. In your mind men are always a leverage God will use

   My life is full of stories where God brought strategic relationships for my personal advancement and the advancement of this vision. Every great person here can tell you their life changed because of the presence of a man

   Many in pain can trace their pain to the presence of men. They did not have that pain until men came into their lives

   Your victory and defeat are not only God dependent but men dependent. You need the intelligence to know how to place the right sets of men around your life.

   He that walks with the wise shall be wise Proverbs 13:20

   There are well-behaved people of character who loved God until they were introduced to certain men and their lives went bad. There are others who were bad, demonic, irresponsible, who were introduced to certain circles and changed

   No man will ever outgrow the influence that comes from men

   You can never be so mature that men stop influencing you. You are only given the liberty to choose who influences you. At every point in your life there is somebody influencing you and somebody you are influencing

   Why some are painfully lonely

   What I am about to share explains why some of us are painfully lonely even though we love God

   If you say everybody hates me, that is an attack on your mind. Everybody cannot hate you like that. It is a sign of negative energy, a pungency that comes out of you

   Like Luke 11, people love you, but they love themselves too. The man said, I love you, but your friendship is about to become an interruption to my children, so stay outside.

   People love you, but not when the relationship becomes an interruption to their lives

   Some never find friends anywhere. Some find friends but the lifespan of any friendship is not more than one month. "I've always been by myself." That is why everything continues to backfire

   If there is nobody you can call at midnight, in trouble, who will say, not under my watch, you are too valuable, your life is hanging on a very delicate balance

   Is there anyone you can call for help, financial or spiritual, and be sure that if the person has the means the person will respond? If the answer is no, your life is in danger right now

   Some move like fugitives in life. Nobody is interested to invest their credibility, reputation and resources in them. If everybody hates you, the problem is you. Everybody cannot be stupid and demonic

   "Because I love God my way is different." You are lying. That would be an insult on the ministry of the Holy Spirit.

   Human beings have mastered the art of avoiding trouble, and they can design trouble from afar

   5 keys to maintain destiny relationships

   1. Rise above competitive jealousy

      You will never maintain strategic destiny relationships when you are prone to jealousy. This is not just an issue of spiritualizing. There is a psychology to it

      It is not unusual to struggle with jealousy when you are in an atmosphere where you see results and you are alienated from it.

      Some people can never be in any circle unless they are the leaders, calling the shots. It is a dangerous mentality

      We got some of it from culture, some from our past, some from demonic attacks. This is why we allow the washing of the water by the word

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      Proverbs 14:30

      Envy is a terrible thing

      "Why does everybody greet so-and-so and leave me?" That should be a reason to go for a retreat Romans 10:12.

      If they have done this to this person, I take responsibility. There is something I do not understand

      What is the secret behind the favor of God in your life that I am not seeing in mine? Five minutes of spiritual lecture can deliver you from years of ignorance

      Careless assumptions and walking in competitive jealousy will always put you in trouble. You see it with preachers, with business people, in the house of God. There is room for everybody

   2. Avoid evil speaking and backbiting

      You cannot maintain relationships in an atmosphere that is perpetually about evil speaking. Nobody will accommodate you in that pungent atmosphere. This is why nobody wants to come around some of you.

      There is nothing to say except gossip

      I think it was Dr. Myles Munroe who said losers talk about people, mediocre people talk about things, great people talk about ideas

      Never allow yourself to be the habitation of gossip and jealousy. Some of you will talk about everybody, and when there is nobody, you will talk about yourself, because you just have to say something

      When your atmosphere becomes conducive, you will be surprised at the kinds of people who gravitate to your life, and with them every blessing they carry.

      When the Magi came to Jesus they came with what they were carrying Matthew 2:11

      When a wise man comes he comes with the benefits of his wisdom to your life

   3. Practice forgiveness and tolerance

      Forgiveness is providing pardon over a default. Tolerance is accommodating the intrinsic weaknesses of people, because it will happen again and again

      If a talkative tells you, sorry, I will not talk again, you don't have to forgive him. You are wasting your time. What you need is tolerance

      Some of you are angry with everybody, including God. Someone knocks your door four times instead of three and it becomes an offense you carry for 10 years.

      When you carry luggage of hate and bitterness you affect your own life too

      Carrying offense and unforgiveness is like swallowing poison and expecting another person to die

      If you don't practice tolerance you will hurt yourself many times, because even the best people who come into your life will have limitations. Looking for perfection is a waste of time. You will never find it

      Illustration: the mosquito

      Someone tries to kill a mosquito around his face. He may miss the mosquito but he will never miss a slap on his own face. The mosquito comes again.

      After 10 slaps the mosquito is not dead. That is what many people are doing to their souls

      Set yourself free. My brother did this, my mother did this. It is a revelation of a superior way of living

   4. Be an active contributor to the growth of the relationship

      Relationships do not build themselves. They are built by the parties involved. This is true for married couples, business relationships, parents and children

      There are parasitic relationships, where people bring nothing. Relationships must be a healthy balance between expectations and contributions

      When your expectation far outweighs your contribution, you are selfish. When your contribution far outweighs your expectation, somebody is being unfair to you

      You cannot contribute 1,000 naira worth and expect 1 million naira worth. That is fraud. It is like giving the bank 1,000 naira and expecting 10 million tomorrow

      Some workers in church will never pay anybody's transport. They have nobody's birthday in mind, including their family members. The only thing they remember is their needs. The entire conversation is about them

      Counsel to our sisters: throw away some of the garbage that comes from misguided social media. The moment you are in any relationship that makes it all about you, you are already in trouble

      Not even our relationship with God is all about us. When we say, God, take everything, He says, I am not so selfish, I will attend to you also

      Where you do not have any definite value to offer, let your value be gratitude. Keep showering that relationship with lavish expressions of gratitude

      Gratitude can equalize even what your value cannot bring

      A man whose wife brings money, pays the school fees, pays the rent, and he does not even say thanks. That is not wisdom.

      Say, I am not able to do this but I am really grateful. I would not have had the money to buy the fuel but thank you for stepping in

      Someone gives you 100 million naira as a seed in ministry and you can access him. Don't say, God provides, I don't care. You will be poor and you will struggle in ministry. Learn to appreciate people sincerely

      If your wife treats you well, tell her thank you. Train your children to say thank you. This entitlement mentality is destroying Africa. Thank God and thank men

      You can pick up your phone and thank people who contributed significantly to your life. Corporate organizations understand this and that is why they keep excelling. We in the church are masters of taking people for granted

      Pastors, when God gives you members and workers who love you and labor day and night, do not take them for granted. Find every means to say thank you, and repeat it

      It is one thing to be valuable. It is another for people to believe in you enough to invest their credibility, attention, resources and loyalty. Do not take them for granted

      Under normal circumstances, find out what is making your husband run away from you. You cannot yell from morning till night, remembering what happened in 1999 at 12 noon

      Men, let's tame our arrogance and say thank you. Once you cannot help yourself and people do for you what you cannot do, be humble enough to acknowledge them. It does not take anything out of you

      Assignment: say thank you

      Think of people who contributed significantly to your life, including your boss you may say you don't like. Tell them, I came to church, I was inspired, I want to appreciate you

      Most will not reply. That does not mean the effect was not created. The day promotion comes you will know that text added up to your rising

      Someone gives you a loan of one million naira, you rise and become a big man, and you visit his house with oranges worth 100 naira bought at a junction nearby. Don't act like that

      Politicians and non-Christians are masters of investing into strategic relationships. Church people, because of the presence of the Holy Spirit and advantages like favor, don't take these as investments. Start making your investment now

      After service don't push people and run around. The person you push may be the doctor who will treat your child if he has malaria. Treat people with honor and dignity

      Don't look at someone and say, he came for Koinonia looking as if he is dressed in rags.

      Something is happening to his mind, and tomorrow when you see the same son of man in power and glory you will bite your finger in regret

      Never be part of any relationship where it is all about giving to you and you are not an active contributor. It doesn't have to be money. Give love and support

      Many people, the day you get a text from them is because another request is coming. Don't give people memories of pain when they think about you

      This may be one reason people run away from you. You are always thinking about what people will give you, or you have very little value and an unreasonably high expectation.

      Become an active contributor with your time, resources and any leverage you can provide under God

   5. Master kindness and hospitality

      Kindness is the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate

      Hospitality is not about cooking food. It is built upon an intrinsic desire to see people happy and welcomed

      I give you a guarantee under God, you cannot surround yourself with this kind of spiritual and psychological energy and have people run away from you

      Master kindness to your wife, your husband, your children, your superiors, your contemporaries and your subordinates

      In the name of Jesus I declare that kindness begins to walk in my life

      To be kind is to be friendly. Don't look at people and size them from head to toe. Who is your father, who is your mother, what are you wearing, what designer. Don't do that

      Some of the great helpers in my life were some of the most unassuming people by physical appearance. If you were to select people you would not go close to them, yet they have profound influence

      The discernment and ability to communicate honor provided a leverage that I and this ministry still benefit from today. Don't look down on people because of financial status or education

      You drive a 100 million naira car. Don't hit the guy walking on the road just because you are moving, because one day you will buy a car in his company

      When you are starting out in life, live with honor and dignity. Provided you are walking the path of righteousness and integrity, there should be no shame. Don't fake your life

      Anybody who wants you to wear designer clothes before they respect you does not deserve to be your friend. God ordained them leaving you to give you peace, because He saw where that pathway would lead.

      It is selfishness personified

      Beyond being an anointed man of God, beyond being someone trusted with revelation and leadership, I pray that this character of kindness and hospitality will come from me, not because I'm a preacher.

      It is a beautiful way to live

      Assignment: give

      There are clothes in your house spoiling. You have outgrown them and will never use them. Go and sort your wardrobe and give to somebody. Decongest your life from a lot of things

      The woman who always sits at the side, whose children have called you mommy for one year. Give them something, school fees. There can never be kindness without giving

      Some of you, your spouse or friend has bought you gifts and you plan to do nothing but say, let me pray for you. You are selfish

      People should not go out of their way to show you love and care and then you throw it away

      Some of you have never blessed any man of God that God used to bless your life. You receive, you grow, you increase. I'm not asking you to give me money. It is a practice in your heart

      Never be part of any ministry, church, man of God or organization where you are consistently blessed and lifted and you don't take it as a responsibility to contribute. If you cannot give money, give prayers.

      If you cannot give prayers, sow the seed of gratitude

      Some of you may need to do this to your parents

      There are wealthy people, millionaires and billionaires, whose parents are in pathetic conditions in the village. Let people rejoice with human beings

      I am a blessing

      Correct whatever attitude problem you have. You are sarcastic, you hate on people, you misbehave. "Apostle, we are like that in our family." If you do not rise above culture you may never prevail in certain dimensions

      Exalt the word of God beyond cultural things. Love the word of God and rise beyond the grip of culture and the limitations it brings to your mind

      God cannot trust you with the destinies of men at a global scale when you are limited in understanding and surrounded with prejudices and biases

      God gave you five children, three biological and two not. Don't humiliate the two simply because their parents are dead. Let them feel the love of genuine parents.

      I made up my mind that everyone under my watch will feel the love of a father without prejudice

      At the end of your life it is not how many things you have acquired that matters. It is who was able to know the Lord because of you, and who was able to smile and find hope

      You cannot become this kind of person and not have one person who loves you and believes in you enough to invest their life.

      Who in your life today have you chosen to invest your time, resources and credibility in?

      The moment you find out you are a parasite, only receiving from people, change. Very soon you will find out you are alone. No human survives an atmosphere with that level of pungency

      Be an active contributor and your relationships will become magnetic. Even if people have nothing to tell you they will want to be around you, because you become the closest expression of Jesus Christ

3. Your relationship with things

   1 Timothy 6:17-21

   Many do not know there is a way to relate with things. You can relate wrongly with things, the same way you relate wrongly with God and with men. Things means all kinds of material possessions

   There is an art, a technology to relating with things in a way that benefits you and does not leave you miserable

   Paul charges the rich. High-mindedness is the side effect of wealth and riches

   We are not in confusion that God gives us all things to enjoy

   He is teaching Timothy how to deal with things. Once you have access to influence and material riches, certain things begin to happen.

   If you do not know how a spiritual man relates to material things, it can tear you into pieces

   At the end of your life, like Judas, the money you have will not bless you. You will lose the money, lose your relationship with Jesus, and even lose your life

   1 John 2:15-16

   It does not mean don't have cars and houses and things that make your life comfortable. The love there means do not develop an ungodly affinity, one you can kill for.

   You can kill for money, you can kill for things

   It is easier to become successful than to remain successful. If God does not help you, you can lose your life, your character, your integrity, everything that makes you you, in the presence of plenty

   Illustration: the bread

   The misbehavior of the people came after the bread. When they were hungry they behaved themselves. They sat down. The moment they ate and were full they scattered bread all around and left.

   When they gathered it, it was 12 baskets full John 6:10-13

   Something happens to men in the midst of plenty. You may behave correctly right now because you owe someone or something is pressing.

   But when you have plenty and are not limited by anything, that is when you see the potential in the heart of man. Pride, and so on

   Secrets to managing things

   Never exalt them above Jesus. Don't have a garage for your car and a safe for your jewelries and yet have no place to meet with God

   Understand that every blessing God gives you is for your comfort, for the revelation of Jesus, and to help you become a blessing to humanity

   I am not teaching you to be careless with things. But the implication of open doors is that among the blessings that come is plenty. With increase comes the burden of management and of correct relationship

   You can relate wrongly with things by making them god. That was the mistake of the rich fool. He made money his god Luke 12:16-21. There are people whose god is money, certificates, pedigree

   Some of the greatest people I have met are extremely humble, godly and honoring in the midst of plenty

   My prayer is that as God continues to show me His mercy, all these things that distract people and produce pride will be far from the corridors of my life

   The believer in Christ has rules of engagement. You don't engage with things as though they are your life.

   "My money, my house, my car, my business, I am a millionaire, I am a billionaire" is the language of an unbeliever

   Not just as a confession, but to rub it into people and demand human worship. That is relating wrongly

   If you are blessed, you are blessed. You don't have to rub it on people's faces. Most who do it are at the infancy of their wealth. Those who are established you know by their stability.

   They use more superior parameters than resources to command respect

   Some of us may need to tame our pride and our attitude towards things

   Remember where He took you from Deuteronomy 8:2. While you were trekking you were moving. Many things went wrong when the blessing began to come

   I still remember the infancy of this ministry. Absolutely nothing, blind trust in Jesus. One of the major financial blessings then was 20,000 naira.

   A lady gave it so that we would buy a mat instead of sitting on the ground

   Do not forget where God took you from. You are a billionaire. You are not the first and you will not be the last. Don't be part of the lessons others are learning negatively

   If God has blessed you, enjoy the blessings of God, but let your heart and mind be on Jesus. You can push away that car, those estates, everything

   People will say, man of God, as great as you are, it is as if you don't like good things. They may be sincere, but they are leading you into deception

   Walk through the doors with Jesus as King

   As the doors begin to open because of this key of relationships, make sure you walk through them making your declaration. Let the doors hear you.

   Beyond cars and houses, beyond ministry and business, beyond prestige and pedigree, Jesus is the king of your life

   Walk through the doors of prosperity, influence and lifting with that song in your heart

   When men want to distract you with another song that makes you the god of the process, respectfully shut them and say, I was mentored properly before the door opened.

   The song will always be about Him. The lifting, accolades and applause will always be about Him

   I am satisfied that He has made me a beneficiary of these open doors

Doors open that you cannot explain

I give you a guarantee by the integrity of God, if you put into practice what you have heard, you will sit down and watch doors open that you cannot begin to explain.

Without any sense of sounding arrogant, I know what I am teaching 2 Peter 1:16

Use the doors of relationship with God, with men and with things. Master the art of knocking, and men will open even at 12 midnight.

You will say, a friend has come, save me from shame, and they will say, you are a friend indeed

Many of you will have relationships give you houses you did not build. Sponsor your children through university. Give you lands you did not buy as a currency

It is not only a spiritual principle. It is a universal principle. You don't have to be a Christian to believe the logic and intelligence of what I'm saying

Do not have money alone. Use part of that money to buy relationships

The cycle of open doors

1. Your relationship with God gives you access to wisdom and favor
2. Wisdom and favor give you access to men and systems
3. Men give you access to resources and influence
4. You use your resources and influence to serve God, to bless men and to live a successful life, which recycles the process

Part of living a successful life is that it gives you more room to maintain and increase your relationship with God

Chemistry, biology and agriculture have all kinds of cycles, like the water cycle. This is a spiritual cycle. If you plunge yourself into it there is no depletion for your life

God gives you true riches, wisdom and favor. You trade wisdom and favor and He gives you men, access to the hearts of men. With men come resources and influence

This is the art of knocking. Show me a man who pays attention to this and I will show you a man who has left his current level, regardless of his background.

Some mysteries take time to show results. This one can speak immediately in your life

Prayer

Altar call

In the order of priority, relating with men will not matter much if your relationship with Jesus is found wanting. Inevitably you will relate wrongly with things in a way that destroys you

If you want to make it right with the Lord Jesus, or rededicate your life, come. He is giving you room to make it right.

He receives us just as we are, and we receive of His life, and that begins a new journey. There is nothing to be ashamed or afraid of.

He is able to give you a new beginning

John 6:37

Isaiah 54:17